I'm a Mormon.

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Hello from tomorrow (across the international date line)

Dear dear dear family and extended audience,

I am trying to decide whether last week happened a year ago or just seven days ago. Oh my my.

Hey, anyone who sends me an email, send me a physical return address. I want to send you a letter. Ahem, Jaime ;) I can write back only to my dear beloved family.

ZONE CONFERENCE was last Thursday. It was lovely, as they say. The zone leaders, President, and the assistants reenacted the creation of the title of liberty, except as applied to the Australia Melbourne mission. Can you imagine, these missionaries throwing off their suit jackets and ripping off their white shirts, buttons flying (and I'm sitting in the front row), and hoisting them on curtain rods or tree poles. They had other shirts on underneath, don't worry. Next, the mission leaders decided that we needed to learn to trust each other so we had to fall...voluntarily...backwards...off of tables they placed on the stage in the gym. And the stage wasn't high enough? The missionaries on the floor caught each person as they fell.  I admit I was frightened. THEN... have you ever explored a eucalyptus jungle before? No? Oh, that's too bad. As zones we climbed "The Thousand Steps" in the Dandenongs (Google it), all holding a rope, again working together. My zone is miracle makin' Maroondah. This was my first jungle experience, something that honestly I have daydreamed about, except I thought it would have been in Brazil. Okay it wasn't quite a jungle, but almost. Those are all the highlights of a kind of zone conference that will never happen again. It was all the zones of the mission, even the zone that's "out bush" (in the outback). Usually they don't come.

My friends in Provo, and then at the MTC, always laugh at me because I "know everyone" and that continues even here. When my companion lived in Singapore, she knew and went to the home of one of our family friends (Heejay, howdoyaspell it, Wylie), and I once knew Elder Hyatt's brother, and I know Elder Kariya's sister. It's called networking, ha.

We taught a Pentecostal lady last week. I said the opening prayer and I was nervous she was going to join in with me. I don't understand why she wants us to keep teaching her because she's so insistent on everything being wrong. She prayed to know the Book of Mormon is true and apparently she got a no, but she didn't even open it first to learn what it is...it doesn't work that way :) But she loves us and wants us to come back every week. Then I don't understand what my role is with this Indian Sikh family. The ways of God are mysterious. Yes. Sonia, the 14-year old daughter, came to the live nativity on Sunday and one of her school friends was there.

This is a good story, Sister Wang and I were on bikes Monday riding to Knox City. We were halfway there when she got the idea to go visit Pujitha (PJ)...he wasn't home but we stopped by the home of this other guy we had kind of decided to drop the previous evening. He was home and we taught him the Plan of Salvation and the Gospel of Jesus Christ lessons, and he was quite interested in the doctrine of repentance. It was so sweet--he asked me so sincerely whether Jesus really would forgive him of the things he's done in the past. I had been kind of craving to see an investigator ask me trusting questions. He set a baptism date with us. Last night, however, he called to say the Navy had called him up to begin training this weekend. We'll fight for him.

Yesterday was the weirdest day of my life, or at least of my mission. We got our first media referral in 5 months (when someone sees one of our commercials on television and calls to request a book of video) so we went to the neighborhood to deliver the item. He wasn't there, so we knocked on some doors. We found a lady who didn't want help carrying in her boxes and boxes of soda cans, a proclaimed and devoted atheist (which is normal), an old man who kept saying "you're wasting your time! You're wasting your time!" (affari miei), a lady on oxygen who when asked how she's doing said "not good" and we asked if she's okay and she said "yes." What? Then we knocked on this door and the lady who answered said "I just lost my husband..." Sister Wang is the only one of the two who can see her and she's saying but... but... not really getting anything out. She closed the door and I'm just heartbroken for this woman, so we wrote her a note to leave in her mailbox. As we stand in her driveway, I'm writing, and crying, saying God's plan is for families to be together forever, and we know her husband is precious to her, and that God sorrows when she sorrows. Then we discover we were on the wrong street, and go to deliver the stuff to Damien Silver, except he hadn't even requested it, and "doesn't care" if God exists, and I tell him kinda sassy that maybe he doesn't think about God but God thinks about him ALL THE TIME, and then we visit this girl who got baptized a couple weeks ago, and everyone in her house is making fun of the missionaries, but we can tell they love us, and this 19-year old girl is pulling on her cigarette in front of me saying "don't tell Elder Jensen [who baptized her] that I smoke" and demanding that he goes to visit her. Then we go street contacting, and speak with this crazy old bus driver who says "ARE YOU AMERICAN? WHY DON'T YOU STAY IN AMERICA? GO TO YOUR OWN FIRST. GO TO THE POOR AND NEEDY. THEY NEED YOU THERE WHERE HURRICANE KATRINA HAPPENED. THERE ARE NO POOR HERE. GO TO PAPUA NEW GUINEA AND HELP THE BLACK PEOPLE. THIS IS A SOFT OPTION. YOU'RE ON HOLIDAY IN AUSTRALIA. HOLIDAY!!!" Oh my. Then: "JOSEPH SMITH? THE GERMANS IN 1930 THOUGHT HITLER WAS A GOD. HOW DO YOU KNOW HE'S NOT ANOTHER HITLER?" Then when asked what he believes happens to us when we die: "I'LL TELL YOU WHERE THE HUMAN RACE IS GOING. IN 300 MILLION YEARS ALL THE STARS YOU SEE IN THE SKY WILL BE POPULATED BY HUMANS. WE CAME FROM FISHES AND MONKEYS AND WE WILL CONTINUE ONLY AS BITS OF DNA, GOING OFF TO THE STARS." But then as we finished and left he thanked us for a good conversation and promised to read the pamphlet. I wrote in caps because he was standing above us in the bus yelling down at us. Then we went to see my favorite, Gary, and he tells us how he hates marriage. After dinner we sang a Christmas carol to the neighbors of those who treated us, and they tried to give us money. Such a weird day. :)

Fires are burning out in the bush so there's smoke everywhere. People are too busy for us, it being the Christmas season, so we aren't having too much success or appointments. This afternoon, it's preparation day, but we're going to go and try to rescue Chris.

I read somewhere recently that the ability to weep is a spiritual gift. I haven't been crying really at all but it really is heartbreaking, and I want to as soon as someone closes a door in front of you and they won't open their eyes to the beauty that you know.

Dad--say hi to Weston for me! Remind him that he owes me a letter. I will be calling the family on Christmas, but I don't know whether that means on my Christmas or yours. It might be Christmas Eve for you. Sorry we haven't worked out any details yet. But keep your cell phones on in case I have to call at a weird time or in case no one is home. Jeremia is SMART! That's so cute that he tried to put the star back in the sky. Congrats on the new ordination.

Rebooka--congratulations on being the first of my friends to get me a letter while I'm in Australia. At Zone Conference the office elders lined up everyone's mail and amidst the wreckage of everyone's Christmas packages and letters, there was your sweet note, smiling at me like an old friend. :)

Spence--roger that. Ha, I gotta go.

Love you every one,
and MERRY CHRISTMAS!
Read 3 Nephi 11.
Savanna

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