the garbage renegades and the essence of liberty

here in crema we have what's called "raccolta differenzata" which means compulsory recycling and sorting of rubbish. here are the categories:

friday morning pickup
umido: organic stuff. food.
plastica: bottles, saran wrap, etc.

tuesday morning pickup
carta/cartona: paper and cardboard
secco: everything else that can't be recycled.

i have been here a month and i think we've already forgotten to take the trash out at least 3 times. it has to be out by 7 a.m. the real tragedy is forgetting to take out umido because then you've got a stinky green bucket of slimy spinach and moldy tomatoes waiting for a week in your kitchen. but i came up with a strategy--which we will never use--to get our umido to the whereever they take it. and that is haul our umido in its biodegradeable bag to the other collection zone of the city on a different day. in effect, commandeer someone else's garbage day. assuming that it's a day or two later. i can just see us stealing through the city by night wearing capes and masks... gotta get rid of the umido.

i'm going to firenze / florence in a few hours. except first i have to teach shawna's class because that little fiend called me and begged me to teach geography for her. it's fine because i've already taught this lesson three times but not fine because i thought i was done for the day and now i have to work until 5:20, finish up business at school, pack, and get a 6:28 train. BUT what i get out of it is a free train ride to florence, a 32.87 value.

mauro asked me a question yesterday that really made me think. i told him that i love the book 1984, and so does he, and so does shawna. a few hours later he asked me to explain how i can love that book, for it's not in accordance with my life. for all you uneducateds who haven't read it, the book is the one that the idea of "big brother" came from... oh yeah and doublespeak and lots of other worthwhile things. it's about an ultracomformist, controlled society where nobody has choices. the lesson of the book is that liberty is absolutely essential to humanity. and according to mauro, i live a life devoid of liberty; i am robbed by my religious beliefs of my choices. he sees me going home on saturday night so i can leave for milan at 7:30 am and not having their kind of fun, and he sees those as restrictions placed on me by a i suppose tyrannical power like the one in the book. i tried to explain to him in my awkward italian that instead i believe that i have complete freedom, that i am ultimately free because i choose the consequences i want and then the actions, that i am free from dependence... after going home i studied the idea a little more and found that the idea i tried to explain to him of liberty is pretty much exactly the definition that is found in the dictionary at the end of the book of mormon, or at least the italian version. free to choose either "eternal life" or "captivity because of sin" or something. i have to go teach silly shawna's class now but as this is a critical question i would like to explore it later. critical for every person to understand the source of their liberty.

ciao from crema and in several hours from florence!

savanna

not the best entry ever but we've gotta publish.

there's a certain kind of pain that can numb you
there's a type of freedom that can tie you down
sometimes the unexplained can define you
sometimes silence is the only sound
(nickel creek)

i waited until february 14, 2006 to check the grade i got in my poli sci capstone class. i was scared. i wanted an A-, expected a B+, wouldn't have been surprised over a B, and feared something lower. well let's just say that i got what i wanted. yay.

i don't think i have bought anything that has made me happier than my iPod. music just does something. i'm listening to nickel creek right now. hence above lyrics. i didn't write those this time. i want to sing along but that means more people staring at the american.

i want to go to russia. italy's that much closer, right?

feeling unfocused. does that mean i'm hungry?

i'm going to carnevale next week in venezia. i've never seen venice. i'm going with a friend from BYU. we took italian 101 and 102 together. will be fun to see him. except i need a costume.

new favorite quote from shawna: "i'm not mocking you. i love you."

i got my first "stipendio" or paycheck yesterday. paying rent and phone is not fun. € 500 and about a fourth of it left.

i'm bored. more later.

sav

to get me through this semi-charmed kinda life

i'm going to catania today. that's in sicily. this trip will be much nicer than vienna i think because i am staying with a family and it's not twelve degrees below zero. i am nervous and excited... nervous because it's the family of a friend and i want to be charming, and because i love meeting new people and seeing how these foreigners live. plus i get to see a volcano!!!!!!!!

i might be kidnapped by the mafia. let them know that i don't have a rich daddy so asking for ransom will be useless. inutile.

in geography i have been teaching about underdevelopment. first i show statistics, measures of development and their implications. then the dialogue goes like this:
me: do you think this is fair (that GDP is low, literacy is low, infant mortality is high, life expectancy is low, people are hungry)
them: no!!!
me: what would you do about it as the leader of one of these countries?
them: give more money to, for example, education
me: where do you get the money?
them: from taxes
me: but your people are poor. they can't pay more taxes.
them: uhhhh
me: where do you get the money?
them: from other countries.
and then the idea of development aid and corruption comes out. i love geography.

i gotta go.

running around trying everything new, but nothing impressed me at all...i never expected it to

i am an an internet cafe... how classy. ick.

i took my ipod out of the house for the first time today. i just had to listen to jacob's BFF anthem CD.

i have been sick for the past several days and staying in the house every day all day makes me crazy!!!! i went out last night and i'm going out tonight whereas i know i shouldn't.

so guess what, i transferred my photos from vienna to my computer and every single file was there but every file was empty. i would love to cry over my lost photos but i didn't do that much in vienna anyway because it was 12 degrees below zero. which sounds a lot scarier in degrees celsius so i won't provide a conversion. :)

tomorrow my argentina family isn't going to church because there is a block in milano, which means no cars are allowed to go into the city. so i have to find my own way there. i don't want to stay home all day again with nothing to do.

i hate paying for internet.

forget it, i'm going to buy new shoes.

I just decided that I'm going to return to BYU one last time. Summer term 2006. Why? If the GPA cutoff was the same as last year, I'll have a full scholarship; I don't want to return to Longmont with nothing to do (and strangely enough I don't want to stay in Europe); I need a cushion to find a real job; I want to take Italian 321 and Poli Sci 359R, "Parties and Elections in Post-Communist Eastern Europe" (how could I resist!?); I need to go out there for graduation anyway. Plus there are one or two additional reasons I won't publicize :)

Summer term is painless. I'm excited. And because I'm not going right into graduate school I don't have to worry about not having a break between my undergrad and my graduate work which at one time was a reason to not return.

Please don't take this as for sure but this is what I'm thinkin!

Write me.

(PS I love paying off my American Express bills)

mi sento un po' malata

i think that means i feel a little sick. sunday my head hurt, and monday too, and then yesterday my throat, and today my throat a little more plus my lungs and ears and head are congested. i am scared of getting sick because i have insurance but in italy that doesn't stop me from having to pay for health care.

i made the fortuitous mistake of telling paola a couple weeks ago that i will like it better here when i have friends. so starting either the next day or the one after, the teachers have been bringing in their sons my age, one at a time, one day after another. it's pretty funny. one of the boys has a group of like six other boys that shawna and i have been going out with. they're fun but they'd better start thinking of something more interesting to do than go to pubs, because i'm not into having to choose between standing outside in the cold with people who are smoking (smoking is banned now in italy in public indoor places, thank goodness) and standing inside and emerging smelling like drinking italians. gross. actually that only happened once. usually what italians call bars are places to drink coffee or in my case cioccolata and there is one really nice one called klejnot (say "clay note") all decorated in red and cute victorian furniture with live music, and thanks to parliament, no smoke. while i was in vienna they wanted to go bowling but there was this blizzard so no one could get their cars out of the driveway.

and speaking of snow, the snow here is very wet and deep and it doesn't go away because no one takes care of it! the snow plows didn't come through the main roads until, say, sunday (two days after the heavy snow started) and in certain places still no one has shoveled the sidewalks. this is not the land of american initiative and neighborliness where sidewalks are cleared by the common man by 9 am after a snow.

i hate that i am eight hours ahead here because i check my email when i arrive at work in the morning and again when i leave around 5. but people at home sleep between those hours so i don't get anything new except for annoying "be a good republican" emails from GOP chairman ken mehlman left over from when i was doing the media/political analysis class.

SO... the price of you reading my blog, whoever i am addressing with this abstract "you", is to send me an email. dodgycharacter@gmail.com. come on, you owe me.

i just emailed the paralympics to beg them to be a volunteer. that sounds better to me anyway than doing the regular ol' olympics.

i missed the state of the union address last night for the first time in my life since the age of like 9. but don't worry, ken mehlman GOP chairman sent me my own copy ;)

my eyes are sore, as they always are when i am a little sick or congested. okay bye.

savanna

madaboutmadaboutmadaboutmozart

there's something funny about seeing asian people drinking beer. i guess i expect them to be more refined and stick to sake or something.

it's mozart's birthday and i am in vienna!!!!!!!!!!! and i didn't even do it on purpose. i had a heavenly moment tonight. after the opera (die zauberflote [pronounce dee tzOW beh flute-uh], wasn't quite ready for it. opera is an art that should be restricted to italian, or any other language that doesn't sound ridiculous. do germans know they just sound like a parody all the time? i love german, but really.) i walked from the opera house past the huge museums and the parliament and the city hall. it was dark. and cold. but coming from the heavens (be they blessed) were the voices of angels singing mozart's coronation whatever. it's music composed for performance in cathedrals. the vienna choir boys had a performance this evening and they played it on huge speakers for people walking around the government area to hear. blisssssssssssss.

i also went to mozart's house. i saw his death mask. death masks fascinate me, which is weird i guess. but whoever thought of death masks had a good idea. else how would we know how so many famous-and-beloved people look like? portraits aren't always accurate.

MozartMozartMozart
a few mozarty things i did today. happy birthday amadeus!

visited mozart museum
bought mozart notebook
met mozart tour guide
bought mozart cd
ate mozart croissant
saw mozart death mask
used mozart cloak room
hummed mozart overture
conducted mozart melody
watched mozart opera
wrote mozart blog

i shouldn't publicize this. but when i made my reservations for the hostel in bergamo, i saw that towels are included. so i thought that would be a standard-issue hostel thing. not so, and i am dirty for it :) i went through the alternatives and none of them are feasible. a few days without a shower isn't that bad, right? hahaha. so it'll have to wait until i get back to italy saturday night. gotta shower for church. awwwwwwww italy. cuore mio.

tomorrow i might go to a palace, perhaps buy some religious paraphernalia, and head back to bratislava. that's in slovakia, once again, ladies and gentlemen.

i might fall asleep on this dirty hostel keyboard. so buona notte, or guten nacht, or good night, or just get outta here.

sava

my jeans are tired

Austria: cold cold cold cold cold cold cold cold and cold!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

don't come to vienna in january.

here i am paying two euros for 45 minutes of internet time, which is now only 35. my thoughts on austria. first of all, i love that there are more colors here. the inside of every train is orange. it's a more austere society. even the voice in the metro announcing that the door is about to close, and the following rush of the doors shutting, is fatal and final. everyone speaks english, much better english than i had expected. my hostel is quite nice, which is a benedizione considering it's my first time. today i missed italia, which i suppose is beginning to feel like home.

I SAW LE NOZZE DI FIGARO TODAY!
i have that syndrome, i think--called stendhal or something. i know because when the orchestra started my heart stopped. oh and by the way the person who was supposed to be sitting in front of me (box seats, orchestra left) didn't show so i sat in a 95 euro seat. it was so beautiful. i love the mozartmania that is taking over europe; it makes things more accessible. tomorrow i go back to the opera house slash palace to see die zauberflote, also by mozart. this opera though i know nothing about.

watching the orchestra, in particular the violins, energizes this ambition in me to take violin lessons, join a city orchestra, something. i realize that i have decades ahead of me. people make you think that when you are young that is the only time you have to develop yourself. wrong! i am going to learn to play very well whether in 30 years or 3. and here at the hostel there is a piano and they have sheet music for my favorite beethoven sonata, the pathetique, which a few weeks ago i resolved to eventually learn how to play.

agh! as i have been typing i have been frustrated by the apostraphe and dash being in the wrong place but i just realized that this is an AMERICAN keyboard! and i was thinking it was wrong! no! italy really is becoming home.

today i ate wiener schnitzel and apfel streudel and some german sausage thing and a pastry. geez, after freezing today and returning home to sleep under a warm blanket, i was discouraged over having two more days in this city but now after the opera i am reencouraged. it seems less cold at night, not sure why. but i am not whining on the inside.

so a day and a half of vienna, then bratislava, then bergamo saturday night, then back to crema sunday. it's cold. i gotta go put my socks on the radiator or something :)

thanks for reading
;)
sava

no time left to think of creative subject. mariahilferstrasse!

i just want everyone to know that i went to eastern europe today.

bratislava, slovakia.

holla!

now i'm in vienna.

distracted by my own beauty

when beppe saw shawna at the severgnini house, he said 'italia ti fa bene.' then translated: italy is doing you well, you're blossoming.

italy is NOT doing me well! instead of flourishing i'm sleeping too much and breaking toilet lids.

yes, breaking toilet lids. i'm about to publicize my most private embarrassing moment :)

my swimsuit came in the mail yesterday. i had paid $20 to some online swimsuit company to send me a random swimsuit. shipping was free, even internationally, and i'm not one to avoid a risk, so sign me up. i tried it on but because the mirror in the bathroom is high i could see basically only down to my neck. i realized as i was about to get a chair from the kitchen (so i could see the whole thing) that the reason shawna closes the toilet sometimes is to stand on it and look at her outfit in the mirror. so, i VERY CAUTIOUSLY, using the lavatrice/washing machine as backup, climbed on the toilet to do the fit inspection. i pronounced it satisfactory and as i got down, the lid shattered into six heartbreaking pieces. my sole victory is that i did not fall in because of my advanced agility.

shawna's not mad. but now the weird blonde american girl has to go shopping for a toilet lid, and probably a seat/lid set because i doubt they come separately. and i already thought that everyone stares at me; will they stare more when i'm carrying around a porcelain toilet fixture?

in other news, there aren't any. italian boys wear coats with fur on the hoods. when i taught yesterday i tried to tell my students that i have a baby brother and they thought i was telling them i'm pregnant. right... the water in my apartment smells different when it gets hot, like the gas used to heat it i suppose. the students all want to know if i have a boyfriend (no), if i watch the OC (no), and which movie stars i'm in love with (no, i mean none). i think i lost points with them when i told them i listen to beethoven.

my student loan excess funds haven't yet made it to my bank account, which means i have no money other than the $100 cash my parents gave me when i got on the plane that i haven't changed into euros yet. i'll probably get maybe 75 euros for them. dang!

i read the parable of the olive tree today in jacob and i think it's pretty special :)

well i discussed with some teachers what i am going to do the next few weeks. i get to teach for the 'diritto' class, which i think means rights, which eventually translates to law, i think. so that is very familiar to me, the first chapter being composed of electoral systems and types of government (unitary, federal). facile! plus i have to do something about underdevelopment for geography and pearl harbor for history. i have to figure out some way to get away from the beloved teaching method here, which is to read/copy out of a book. i am very impressed that when i met with the teachers, we did all of the discussing and planning in italian. i am amazing.

that's enough; who's going to read this? :)

p.s.: sunday: brescia with the severgninis or church? just joking, don't want to make that choice again, but does it have to be this complicated? why doesn't anyone ever go sightseeing on saturday?

young and in love

my first day in the monolocale/studio apartment...

me: Shawna, my toothbrush moved in with yours.
Shawna: it's the metaphor for our relationship! Two toothbrushes living together in a carciofi jar.

I'm in Crema, Italy. It's an unknown town southeast of Milan in Lombardy. It is fake to me, as if someone spliced everything that looks Italian to me from movies or my perceptions and stuck them all together in one place. Concentrated images of Italian life. Surreal when paired with the questions running through my mind like 'what am I doing here?' and 'did I really get on that plane?'. The only thing to do here is 'fare le vasche' which means dress up and walk up and down the streets of downtown and go window shopping. It's a special occasion that occurs every night. It's hard not having any friends, not that I am lonely, but that I don't know what to do with myself. No transportation, little associations, no phone yet, and I just figured out what direction is north. It's nice though, learning to take life a little slower.

My mental faculties have escaped me recently. For example, thinking the light on the wing of the plane was the moon?! And saying various other dumb things. Tripping.

Sunday was pretty sweet. I missed church, which I don't want to do anymore, because I couldn't contact the only member whose number I know, I didn't know where to go, I didn't have money for the train because my American Express wouldn't work and my Visa checking account is empty. Comunque, I went to lunch at the Severgnini house (family of Paola, the professoressa I work with) and then to see the castle at Pandino. The Severgnini house is quite possibly the most impressive I've ever seen. I can't describe it but I want to take photos next time. Paola's father is old and charming. I understood all of his Italian, probably because his speech is, as he put it, adagio. Paola's brother is called Beppe Severgnini... he is the Italian correspondent for the Economist and an author. Paola gave me his latest book and he signed it. It's quite funny. In America it is called 'Ciao America! An Italian discovers the US'. Also charming he is and reminds me of a mix between Prof. Hancock of BYU and Mitch Davis. After lunch it was the castle but we didn't stay long because there was no guide so we'll go back later. I love sightseeing and observing life of the locals, so it was perfect.

A matter of curiosity is the part where I don't participate in most of the treasured practices of the Italians. My abstention from coffee, wine, cigarettes arouses many questions, which lead to questions about my religion. I usually expect people to react negatively about my religion but instead most I have met are interested in hearing a little about my beliefs... I love that it's not taboo and awkward as it sometimes can be at home. I love the idea of explaning it in this foreign language but I haven't encountered that challenge yet.

My problem today is I just want to talk to everyone and find out why. Innocent questions like Why are you a teacher? Why do you live in Crema? and pervasive ones like Why did you get married? Are you in love? and offensive ones like Why do you think you have to teach this way? Do you not have teacher development? Do you even like kids? Being in the midst of another culture just makes me think. And I want others to think about things too. Do you even like your clothes/going to discos/your life? What do you want to do with your life. Ah, the question. What do you want to do with your life?

Today one of the girls asked me if I am confused--I have finished university and I don't know whether I want to be a lawyer or a teacher or what. And yes oh how I am confused! :)

The school is strange--all the walls are painted with weird stuff. The graffiti is inside too. Like above a doorway, 'welcome to hell' and there's a graphic of a dog with a caption that translates 'bad dog'. And somewhere there is the f..... word, ugly (by the way, that word is everywhere, songs, clothes, movies, schools apparently).

Italians are so friendly!!! Always saying hi and bye and laughing and inviting. No more social awkwardness, yessss! Last night Shawna and I went out to a caf with her post-diploma student, Vincenzo, 25, and his friend Davide. They're Sicilians, from Syracuse. When we were parting and doing the go-home Italian kiss-on-the-cheek thing, Vincenzo asked how many they do in Chicago, like how many kisses (2? 3?) and when the answer was that Americans don't do that, he made the most disappointed face and said what a tragedy or something. Yeah, Americans can't have feelings apart from anger and disrespect. Sore overstatement, sorry, but think about it: those are the ones allowed/promoted on television. Always competition.

Okay, vi lascio adesso. As soon as I get settled in and oriented I will like being here a lot more. I need to find someone to talk to and someone to bombard with questions :)

The end.
Ho fame!
Savanna