When I grow up

In a living room on a Sunday afternoon:

Sav: What profession can you see me having?
Rob, without hesitation: You mean, other than a talk show host?
Sav: Haha, what? This isn't the first time you've thought this, is it?



(which Rob confirms and then explains himself)



(Additional responses invited: what profession could you see me having/being good at? Your input could change a life.)

Need New England.

I need to talk about this. I am 83% certain that I will live in Boston over the summer. I was halfheartedly planning on staying in Miami to relax and enjoy the area and maybe get some temp work here and there for extra cash.

But (if you'll allow me to be frank) I don't want to stay in Miami because even with a good number of friends, I find it easy to be intellectually lonely here. That is the worst kind of loneliness for me. I need kindred spirits and Bostonia is the surest place I've ever known for finding those. I HUGELY miss having like-minded close friends.

And I have money this time. ;)

Let me know if you have any better ideas!

unsolicited, overgeneralized advice...

...to males. First of all, I love you. Really. (Or okay, not just to males: it can apply to any of my friends.)

Sometimes the battery to a woman's car may die at three inopportune moments in one day: for example, when she is leaving for work at the last possible moment, or perhaps when she is the last person to leave a late-evening meeting and the car is in a dark parking garage.

If you should encounter such a woman--especially if she may have been somewhat tearful earlier--she may not need your abundant, brilliant, practical solutions: AAA, a battery-charging kit, a push start. She may not need reassurances that it will help her grow into a stronger person. She knows how to fix things. Those things the internet can tell her.

From you, she may just need a hug and to know that she has allies. She may just need to know that she is not the only one looking out for her. She may also be confronting the daily, ugly, heartbreaking realities of the achievement gap, and may become overwhelmed if she feels vulnerable. She probably just wants to feel that she is not alone.

She may be me; you decide.

China was my Valentine

One year ago, I met China. It was love--a difficult, uncomfortable, longing sort of love. The love that intoxicates for fourteen days then thrusts you away to wonder whether it ever happened. When the artifacts--tickets, trinkets--finally convince you that it was real, you are left cold and alone to ponder your irretrievable loss. The reality at once exalts and stings as you clutch the tangible evidence to your heart. You cling to the subject of your adoration but each passing day places its own claim on your prize. Undocumented moments are slowly consumed by time. Sweet encounters become subdued and then fall out of memory. You step back to take pause, gather the pieces, and realize that the recollection you have assembled is incomplete. Disappointed but not defeated, you fold it gently, set it on the shelf labeled experience, and shift your consciousness toward the most urgent riddle: the present.

In other words, my travel journal is missing a lot. Next time I write a travel journal, it should be less what I'm thinking about and more what I did.

The highly extended 28 February 2009

(hey, it's like a leap year, a little)

I'm on the plane about 45 minutes out of Detroit. Looking out the window to see land, I exclaimed internally: God bless America! Then, seeing frozen ground, edited: God bless Canada!

Despite having an entire row of 3 seats to myself, I haven't slept as well as you might hope. I have an 8-hour layover in Detroit. I'm trying to work out a strategy to either get onto an earlier flight or get a pass into an airline lounge so I don't have to sit on those hard seats or find an obscure place to sleep. I'm weary.

Last night at Big Echo Karaoke was so fun. At first it was only me, Amy, Xiaomei, and Brett, but eventually like 12+ people were there. Xiaomei sang a couple of propaganda songs, which was pretty hilarious. I would chirp into the Chinese songs whenever I would recognize a character which was rarely more than one per line, if that. A couple of guys really got into "Are you gonna be my girl" by Jet. Great song, fun. One of the guys (Colin) is Chinese Australian and I adored hearing him speak. I announced this to the group as we stood outside and another guy (Eric) said he could hear me change to speak more like Colin. Xiaomei did not concur but I did because I liked it.

My last day in Shanghai was nice. I didn't go out until like 2 then went on part of the DK guide walk through the Old City. I am inspired by the architecture I saw in Xin Tiandi. It would be fun to design a house exterior based on the buildings there. They're gray brick with a red stripe. I didn't appreciate the walk as much as I could have because I needed to use a bathroom. I found a public toilet and paid 1 yuan, received 3 little coins back, the attendant was very happy when I returned the paper towels I didn't need. Anyway, much to my surprise? chagrin? shame? the toilets were a tiled trench in the ground that ran through three open stalls. It flushed every so often, so if you cared to see it, you could see the results of others' visits to the trench flow past underneath. A true display of grace and elegance. Huh.

I visited a bird and fish and random animals (chinchilla, strange mutant fuzzy bunnies) market and was thankfully largely ignored there.

A girl from Cranbourne was in line in front of me at the Tokyo airport :)

[highly anticlimactic end of my travel journal]

27 February 2009: Shanghai

My last day in China. I feel done. I just want to go buy some souvenirs and maybe take a few photos. It's cold and rainy. We're going to karaoke tonight though so that should be great fun. It's on Nanjing Dong Lu. Maybe I can go see the Pudong at night. Maybe not.

Anyway I have taken a sudden interest in property law--what it means to own something and how that has developed throughout history. A relevant scripture is Helaman 12:18-19 because it implies that a possession is part of a man and is connected with his character.

26 February 2009: Shanghai

Just read Helaman 11. It said at a certain point the majority of the Nephites and Lamanites were members of the church. One of the things I hate most that I hear at church is when missionary work comes up and there is way too much emphasis placed on being a good example and not enough on actually talking to people or actually doing something that might be hard. One RS lesson in LP2 last fall in particular made me realize how ineffective and scared we are. So when it said most people were members of the church I thought of this be-a-good-example-equals-fulfilling-my-missionary-responsibilities attitude. Yeah, I bet all the onlooking Lamanites/Nephite nonmembers saw the church members' examples and wanted to change. No, it was only the preaching of the word that made the change. Too many members want the "There's something different about you...what is it? I want it?" fairy tale (albeit one that does sometimes come true) and so keep on living, "keep doing what's right" (that detestable vague phrase so often used) until fairytale investigator comes along. How unfortunate is it that we think someone will see us "doing what you know is right" quietly every day, perceive that we have some source of joy they don't have, ascribe it to some minority, misunderstood religion, ask us what makes us different, and accept an invitation (which probably won't be offered) to learn more about the gospel. That approach leaves so much up to chance, so much room for misunderstanding and misinterpretation. So improbable that it will work.

I need to remember Sister L.'s example if I'm not going to be one of those who is at ease in Zion. I don't want to be. So I need to continually create opportunities to invite people to things. I think T--f-A-- will help me with this. May I receive this opportunity.

In other news, I need to figure out how to feed myself today. I think I'll go to the aquarium.

25 February 2009: Shanghai

Hey there Delilah!? heard at Tesco

a glance that lasted
_________endured
_______________beyond a continent
and then dissipated
to be carried away
_______________on the headwind





I'm in Shanghai now.
I love street food.

24 February 2009: Great Wall

On a pretty much empty train from 北京北 to 八达岭 (Beijing Bei to Badaling) My original plan to hike from Jinshanling to Simatai was thwarted yesterday by some inaccurate guidebooks and a contingent of suspicious unmarked minibus drivers.

I'd forgotten how much I love riding the train through the countryside.

China feels so old. Like in Italy old things survive and feel like relics but old things in China are still alive, are still preserved as a way of life. I think of the brooms made of sticks and old men carrying their belongings in grain sacks.

22 February 2009: Beijing

Okay I'm disappointed that I haven't written the past couple of days. Although on Friday I did write Richard a letter, the draft of which is in the back of this notebook. I am now in Beijing staying at the house of Curtis and Amanda A. They are lovely. Their daughter E. is 4 in April and so articulate and so smart. Amanda feeds her knowledge and helps her connect information at every possible opportunity, in every conversation.

I rode the overnight train from Kaifeng to Beijing Xi on Friday night. The experience of getting on the train was reminiscent of WWII images of Jews getting on trains. Kind of freaky for me to say, I know, but allow me to explain. It was dark, people were lined up carrying goods in various containers, the people shouting instructions in an incomprehensible tongue wore army green imperial (reich) looking uniforms, there was a sense of urgency. Okay I'd better get ready for church.
--
Found a Taiwanese guy to help me buy a train ticket = answer to prayer. Saw Olympic Stadium. Went to Classens for YSA lunch. Met Franca. Decided not to fear man more than God. :)

19 February 2009: Kaifeng

I think today was my favorite so far. Well that's hard to say, but it was great. We went to buy glasses--RMB 300 for 2 pairs. I like mine but the prescription isn't quite right. No surprise there. But then we ate at Richard's house and went to the judges mansion, or whatever. It was the parents, 2 aunts, an uncle, and us 2 young ones. I think they loved me. We had a lot of fun. I gave all of them my US coins. They were entranced. Dinner was some soup with various mushrooms. It was quiet. And I fell. My shins hurt. I'm tired. Learned a word. Si ba'. Or something. Means yeah? or really?/right?